I love the energy of a brand new year – there’s a sense of freedom that I feel and that I see with my coaching clients. It’s a time to reflect on what worked and what didn’t work in the previous year, decide what you want to leave behind, and choose what new habits and practices you’re ready and inspired to adopt and embrace.
When we’re engaged, it’s easy to get sucked into the logistical and emotional vortex that is wedding planning, and to neglect the rest of our life. Now is a perfect time to check in with yourself and take inventory, so that as you head towards marriage you stay connected with what makes you you and what you want your life to be like after your wedding day.
An exercise to try:
Take a piece of paper and write down every highlight and accomplishment of the previous year you can think of. It might include “big ticket items” like “getting engaged” or “getting promoted,” but be sure to get the “little” gems: the time you stood up for yourself when it felt scary to do so, the day you spent truly connecting with a new friend, taking a multivitamin every day, opening up a savings account, etc. Sweep your brain and think of every success you can, and when you’re done, look over your list and appreciate how many steps forward you’ve taken, how different you are then you were a year before. See what stands out to you. What themes do you notice? Are there certain things you did that you forgot about, that you’d like to do again in the new year?
Next piece of paper! Write down everything –everything!- you want to do this year. Here’s the caveat: don’t write down anything that feels like a “should.” Those are the resolutions that don’t stick, because there’s no real desire behind them. If you want to lose ten pounds, but writing down “go to the gym every day” makes you want to get under the covers, think about what aspect of the goal really (honestly) excites you. Take the “should” goal and transform it into something fun and uplifting: “Rock my favorite pair of jeans” or “Weekly Zumba dates with my best friend,” etc. Write your list of inspiring (and doable!) goals and post them where you can see them every single day. Let them guide you in the choices you make and remind you of what is really important to you here and now.
What are your goals for your new year? What are your wedding goals? Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org if you’d like to share and/or want help customizing goals that stick!
Happy New Year!xo, Sam